"My Husband Won't Help Me": Wife Says Her Man No Longer Contribute Anything to the Family

"My Husband Won't Help Me": Wife Says Her Man No Longer Contribute Anything to the Family

  • A woman who is unhappy with her husband’s lack of contribution to household chores and childcare, wonders if she should leave him or stay for the sake of their children
  • Phillipa Perry, a Psychotherapist, advises the woman to communicate her feelings and expectations to her husband, and to seek professional help if he is unwilling to change or compromise
  • Perry also suggests that the woman should consider her own happiness and well-being, and not sacrifice them for a relationship that is unfulfilling and unequal

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A woman who is unhappy with her husband’s lack of help around the house and with their children wonders if she should end their marriage.

She says that they had agreed on a shared approach to parenting and household chores before getting married, but he has failed to keep his promise and expects her to do everything.

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Husband no longer helps wife at home
Husband no longer helps wife at home. Photo credit: Gettysburg Image Source: Legit.ng
Source: Depositphotos

Here is a short excerpt from the lady's complain:

"I am 47, have two primary-school children and a marriage that is in slow decline. From our initial pre-marriage ideals of a kind of Scandinavian shared approach to parenting and marriage it became apparent that, in fact, our underlying approach was that of his parents. The expectation is that I do everything. Nothing is done in an abusive way, but there is a passive detachment which I see in him that mirrors his dad. In his side of the family, the women run around doing everything while the men watch TV and discuss the news. I have brought this up numerous times, both in frustration and anger and in calmer, sadder moments," she said.

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She has tried to talk to him about this issue many times, but he either ignores her or makes temporary changes that don’t last.

She doesn’t want to break up for the sake of their children, but she also doesn’t want to live like this forever.

In the report which was published by Guardian UK, a psychotherapist and author, Philippa Perry, suggests that the woman should not act in haste or rage, but rather try to understand why her husband behaves the way he does and how they can work together to change their patterns.

Perry says that people tend to mimic their parents’ roles in marriage, unless they are gently challenged by their partners.

She also says that the husband may not be hearing the woman’s words when she shouts at him, but only feels attacked and defensive.

She advises the woman to express her feelings and needs calmly and clearly, and to ask for his help in finding solutions.

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She also recommends that they seek couples counseling if they can’t resolve their problems on their own.

Perry warns the woman that leaving her husband may not solve her issues, as she may encounter similar problems with another partner or face new challenges as a single parent.

She says that the woman should only leave if she is sure that there is no hope for improvement or happiness in their relationship, and that she has exhausted all other options.

She encourages the woman to think about what she wants from her marriage and what she is willing to give, and to communicate that with her husband in a respectful and honest way.

Read the full article here

Husband acts like his wife does in the house, ties towel & wears shower cap, complains about everything

Meanwhile, Legit.ng previously reported that a woman has gone online to show people how her two years wedding anniversary was celebrated in her home.

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As a way to mark their love, the woman asked her husband to role-play how she acts at home.

With a towel tied around his body and shower cap on, the man walked out of the bathroom behaving like his wife as he complained about clothes hanging around the house.

Source: Legit.ng

Authors:
Basit Jamiu avatar

Basit Jamiu (Editor) With more than 5 years of experience in the media (Ikeja Bird, Prime Progress, The Movee), Basit Jamiu works as an editor at Legit Nigeria. He started his journalism career after graduating from Ekiti State University in 2018. He is a 2024 Open Climate Fellow (West Africa), 2023 MTN Media Fellow, OCRP Fellow at ICIR, and Accountability Fellow at CJID. He can be reached via basit.jamiu@corp.legit.ng.