120 worst jokes ever that are so bad they are good
Laughter is the best medicine and a powerful potion for humanity's well-being. Although humour is subjective, some bad jokes end up being hilarious. These jokes will make you look clever among your friends or family. Here are some of the worst jokes ever to make your loved ones chuckle.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Having a great sense of humour is considered an attractive trait. What better way to show your funny side than sharing a bad joke that's so good? Adults and kids alike can't help but laugh at these jokes. From one-liners to cringe-worthy comedy, here is a collection of bad jokes you can't help but laugh at.
Worst jokes ever
There is nothing as good as shared humour. Regardless of whether you are a comedian, there are plenty of lame jokes you can unleash. Below are the worst jokes of all time.
- What's better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
- How many ears does Spock have? Three. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front ear!
- What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
- What's the action like at a circus? In-tents.
- What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
- How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas? He felt his presents!
- What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
- What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y!
- How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
- What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!
- What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.
- How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Tentacles!
- Why did Cinderella get kicked off the football team? Because she kept running from the ball!
- How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!
- What does a zombie vegetarian eat? GRRRAAAIIINNNNS!
- Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper? Never mind… it's tearable.
- What's at the bottom of the ocean and shivers? A nervous wreck!
- Do you know what the loudest pet you can get is? A trumpet.
- What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed-man on a bike? Attire!
- Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil? Because it's pointless!
Terrible jokes that are funny
Some of these worst jokes deserve eye rolls and groans. But somehow, they make people laugh no matter how you hear them. Below are terrible jokes that are funny.
- How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
- Why don't oysters donate to charity? Because they're shellfish.
- Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
- Why are colds, bad criminals? Because they're easy to catch.
- Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.
- Which knight invented King Arthur's Round Table? Sir Cumference.
- Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat? Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
- What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing. They fast.
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.
- What happens when you witness a shipwreck? You let it sink in.
- Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
- What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time!
- What's Harry Potter's favourite method of getting down a hill? Walking… JK, Rolling.
- Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side!
- And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth; and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
- What has two legs and bleeds? Half a cat.
- What do you call a dog with no legs? Call him whatever you want; he's not coming.
- What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.
- What's Whitney Houston's favourite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!!!!
- What did the teacher do with the student's report on cheese? She grated it.
Stupid jokes
Cracking a joke doesn't have to be rocket science. They can be dumb jokes but still make people laugh. Here are stupid jokes that will have your friends cracking up.
- Why are there gates around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in.
- Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight. There would be mass confusion.
- What do bees do if they need a ride? Wait at the buzz stop.
- What did the buffalo say when his son left? Bison.
- What do you call a monkey that loves Doritos? A chipmunk.
- What's green, fuzzy, and would hurt if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.
- What do you call a farm that makes bad jokes? Corny.
- A communist joke isn't funny unless everyone gets it.
- What kind of streets do ghosts haunt? Dead ends.
- What does a house wear? Address.
- What do you call birds who stick together? Vel-crows.
- Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the pee is silent.
- What do you call it when one cow spies on another? A steak out.
- Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject. Now you can talk about Botox, and nobody will raise an eyebrow.
- What happens when a frog's car breaks down? It gets toad.
- What's the dumbest animal in the jungle? A polar bear.
- Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he neverlands.
- Have you heard of the band 923 Megabytes? Probably not; they haven't had a gig yet.
- What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!
- What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.
Cringe jokes
Sometimes, jokes meant to make you cringe can make you laugh. They don't make a lot of sense, but they are hilarious. Share these funny jokes for a good laugh.
- What's the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
- Where do rabbits go for breakfast? IHOP.
- Why did the coffee call the police? It got mugged!
- Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.
- How do you organize an astronomer's party? You planet.
- What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm.
- Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field.
- Why did the photograph go to jail? It was framed.
- What kind of car does an egg drive? A Yolkswagen.
- What do you call a fake father? A faux pa.
- What do you call a factory that sells generally decent goods? A satisfactory.
- Why did the belt go to jail? It held up a pair of pants.
- How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
- Why do birds fly south for the winter? It's too far to walk.
- Did you hear about the mediocre restaurant on the moon? It has great food but no atmosphere.
- Why couldn't the bicycle stand up without help? It was two-tired.
- What do you get a man with the heart of a lion? A lifetime ban from the zoo.
- Why did the shopping cart go to therapy? It was tired of being pushed around.
- What do you call a person with a briefcase in a tree? A branch manager.
- What's the No. 1 cause of divorce? Marriage!
Terrible dad jokes
Dad jokes are usually bad yet hilarious. If you are a dad looking for funny jokes to share with your family, check out the lousy dad jokes below.
- What's E.T. short for? Because he's only got little legs!
- Where did Napoleon keep his armies? Up his sleevies!
- People are making apocalypse jokes like there is no tomorrow!
- What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto!
- What's Forrest Gump's computer password? 1forrest1.
- Did you hear about the hungry clock? It went back four seconds.
- What did the police officer say to the belly button? You're under a vest!
- What kind of magic do cows believe in? Moodoo!
- Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's ok, he woke up.
- Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he had no guts!
- What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? A bagel
- What do you call a fish with no eye? Fsh.
- What is the difference between an angry circus owner and a Roman barber? One is a raving showman, and the other is a shaving roman.
- Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time-consuming.
- My dog has no nose. How does it smell? Awful!
- England doesn't have a kidney bank. But it does have a Liverpool.
- What's the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus!
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
- A red and blue ship has collided in the Caribbean Sea. Apparently, the survivors are marooned.
- Why do chicken coops have two doors? Because if they had four doors, they'd be chicken sedans.
Worst jokes ever for adults
Sharing lame jokes can make almost anyone smile. If you want to put a smile on your loved ones' faces, share these absolute worst jokes with them.
- Did you hear about the girl who quit her job at the doughnut factory? She was fed up with the hole business.
- What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung? The Guardians of the Galaxy.
- Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're so good at it!
- What do you call a dangerous sun shower? A rain of terror.
- How is a woman like a grenade? Remove the ring, and boom; the house is gone!
- Why didn't the astronaut come home to his wife? He needed his space.
- What's the award for being the best dentist? A plaque.
- What's the most terrifying word in nuclear physics? Oops!
- What was the mummy's favourite type of music? Wrap.
- What do you call a man who can't stand? Neil.
- A man died after drinking varnish. It was a terrible end but a beautiful finish.
- How does your feline shop? By reading a catalogue.
- What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
- It's hard to teach kleptomaniac humour. They take things so literally.
- Have you heard the joke about the bed? No? That's because it hasn't been made yet.
- Don't worry if you miss a gym session. Everything will work out.
- How much does an influencer weigh? An Instagram.
- How many bugs do you need to rent out an apartment? Ten ants.
- Do you know why they called it "The Dark Ages?" There were too many knights.
- Wait, you don't want to hear a joke about potassium? K.
Telling jokes is one way to bond with your friends. If you are not great at making good jokes, you can crack bad jokes and still make people laugh. The list of the worst jokes will have you and your loved ones cracking up.
Legit.ng recently published an article about the best son quotes. Having a son is one of the best feelings in the world. The joy of watching your son grow creates a special feeling, and the bond between parents and sons is unbreakable. One of the most effective ways of expressing love to your son is by sending them son quotes.
Sharing these quotes is an excellent way for parents to bond with their sons. Your son will adore and treasure the gesture as it shows love and affection. Son quotes are also a way to reassure your children and guide them through life. Discover the best son quotes you can share with your child.
Source: Legit.ng