100+ best Schitt's Creek quotes from your favourite characters
Schitt's Creek is a Canadian television sitcom aired on CBC Television from 2015 to 2020. The show quickly earned itself a place in the list of the funniest comedy shows of all time. The show is loved for its cast of erratic characters who have a great sense of humour. These Schitt's Creek quotes from your favourite characters will make your day.
Schitt's Creek has been nominated for many awards and won a few of them thanks to its talented cast. These characters have entertained their fans with hilarious quotes. These quotes are not only funny but educative and relatable in everyday living. These are the best Schitt's Creek quotes from your favourite characters.
Famous Schitt's Creek quotes to make your day
Schitt's Creek has lovable characters who have lots of jokes that are always hilarious. Below are some quotes from Schitt's Creek that will have you cracked up.
- Never let the bastards get you down! — Moira
- She sort of fades into the background after a while. You know, like a smoke alarm. —David
- But people love extreme vanity, and they love puppies! — Alexis
- Oh, in case you wake up in a chair with your hands duct-taped together, you can snap the duct tape by just raising your hands over your head and then bringing them down hard. — Alexis Rose
- This isn't Say Yes to the Dress, princess. Orange is the new orange. — Ronnie
- You'd think there'd be more of a market for oversized paintings of other people's families. — Stevie Budd
- It lists Buzzfeed's most motivational quotes for girl bosses under thirty. — Alexis
- Let's not ruin a meal by talking about the process. — David
- Funky is a neon T-shirt you buy at an airport gift shop next to a bejeweled iPhone case. This is luxury. — David
- Like Beyoncé, I excel as a solo artist. — David
- I'm only doing this because you called me rude, and I take that as a compliment. — Stevie
- Talk to the hand, son, because the ears are no longer working. — Johnny Rose
Best Schitt's Creek quotes
Schitt's Creek is a warm, inviting story that is entertaining and has life lessons. Below are the best quotes from Schitt's Creek for everyone.
- I'm trying very hard not to connect with people right now. — David Rose
- You strike me as the sort of person that had a hard time in high school. — Jocelyn Schitt
- What kind of barnyard were you raised in? — David
- You're talking about how nice it is not to talk, but you're still talking about it. — Mutt Schitt
- If airplane safety videos have taught me anything, David, it's that a mother puts her mask on first. — Moira Rose
- I wasn't in rehab; I was at rehab, visiting Stavros. — Alexis
- David, stop acting like a disgruntled pelican. — Moira
- I'm incapable of faking sincerity. — Stevie
- We're drinking, to me, not becoming an alcoholic. — Stevie
- You already know I would climb a thousand mountains for you. — Patrick
- I am pulling the plug if those bunnies feel exploited even a little bit. — Ted Mullens
- David, you have to stop watching Notting Hill. It's not helpful for our relationship. — Patrick
- Hide your diamonds, hide your exes; I'm a little bit, Alexis! — Alexis
Funny Schitt's Creek quotes that will crack you up
A day without laughter is wasted; Schitt's Creek is a show that will give you laughter all day. Use these additional funny quotes from Schitt's Creek to bring laughter to you and your loved ones.
- This place is almost charming. Very rustic cottage. I was half expecting early Unabomber. — Moira Rose
- Just think of them as tiny little roommates whose tiny little poops you get to clean up. — Alexis Rose
- I could not be more at one with nature. I do Coachella every year. — David Rose
- I don't skate through life; I walk through life. — Alexis Rose
- I don't know what kind of carnage I inflicted in my past life to deserve it. — David Rose
- This long, boring story involves a yacht and a famous soccer player. — Alexis Rose
- I would hardly call myself an expert on this subject. And by subject, I mean genuine human emotion. — David Rose
- You must prepare for life and whatever it will throw at you. — Moira Rose
- Not smart enough to stop wearing sweaters in the middle of the summer. — Johnny
- What you did was impulsive, erratic, and melodramatic. But it was also wrong. — Moira Rose
- It's not called Schittsville. It's called Schitt's Creek. — Johnny
- Gwyneth Paltrow does a compost gift exchange. — Alexis Rose
Great Schitt's Creek sayings
The best lines from a show capture the audience's attention, and Schitt's Creek sayings will do just that. The Roses break all the rules of what it means to be a nurturing and conventional family. Here are some amazing sayings from the show.
- I love that journey for me.
- I don't skate through life, David. I walk through life in really nice shoes.
- Where is bébé's chamber?
- Fear not, she hath risen!
- What does burning smell like?
- I like the wine, not the label.
- Let's not count our poultry before it's incubated.
- Fold in the cheese.
- I didn't go missing, David. The FBI knew where I was the entire time!
- Gossip is the devil's telephone. Best to just hang up.
- You get murdered first for once!
- The internet is a breeding ground for fre*ks.
Alexis Rose quotes
Alexis Rose is a fictional character in Schitt's Creek who has a great sense of humour. Here are some quotes by Alexis Rose that will make your day.
- He hasn't even asked for my phone number, which in my experience, means he's either newly married, or he's gay.
- I miss being surrounded by loose acquaintances who think I'm funny, smart, and charming.
- I wasn't in rehab; I was at rehab visiting Stavros.
- I don't want to brag, but Us Weekly once described me as 'up for anything.'
- Remember: no sudden movements, do not reach for the glove box, and no matter what happens, do not tell them your real name.
- There is nothing wrong with asking for what you deserve.
- My name is Alexis, and I did not finish high school. Um, it's this long, boring story involving a yacht and a famous soccer player, like a ton of mushrooms.
- Trust me; no one is thinking about you the way you think about yourself.
- David, the pedals make it move more.
- What now? Do I leave everything behind and move to some random island to be with the love of my life? Because I did that with Harry Styles in England, and it was, like, too rainy.
- If you wake up in a chair with your hands duct-taped together, you can snap the duct tape by just raising your hands over your head and then bringing them down hard.
- The longest relationship was a three-month affair with a Saudi prince, but I was trapped in his palace for the last two months, trying to get to an embassy.
- It's just a checkpoint, okay? I've been through tons of these in Johannesburg. Umm, it's like a drive-thru, except everybody has a gun.
David Rose quotes
David is a member of the central Rose family and the older brother of Alexis Rose in the sitcom. Have a look at these quotes by David Rose.
- I plan to pop a pill, cry a bit, and fall asleep early.
- I haven't bedazzled anything since I was 22.
- You might want to rethink the nightgown first; a whole Ebenezer Scrooge thing is happening. My best to Bob Cratchet.
- You watch a season of Girls and do the opposite of what they do. It's easy.
- The idea of me life coaching another human being should scare you a lot.
- I will not feel shame about the mall pretzels.
- No matter what anyone says, you will always be our first dad.
- I was perfectly fine not trusting people. Not trusting people is what I'm used to. It is my comfort zone.
- I'm starting to feel trapped in an Avril Lavigne lyric here.
- I'm going to need a stiff drink to get through this.
- I do not have much to my name right now, but I have one thing: taste.
- Being approachable isn't that important, anyway. The Queen hasn't smiled since the '70s, and her birthdays are still very well attended.
Johnny Rose quotes
Johny Rose is the patriarch of the central Rose family, and the show revolves around his attempts to rebuild his family's fortune. Below is a list of quotes by Johny Rose on the show.
- Let me explain something about business. It's a dance. Sometimes you lead, and sometimes you follow.
- You're not the only one with an online presence.
- Tweet us on Facebook!
- I've got a closet full of suits, but I don't want to be taken advantage of because I'm overdressed. I need to look like I don't have money.
- Hashtag. Are those two words?
- Oh, look at David. Smart enough to get that joke but not smart enough to stop wearing sweaters in the middle of summer.
- I hope you're enjoying the cinnamon buns and vodka. We thought it was festive in a Scandinavian sort of way.
- Cancel your trip, Alexis, because the travel agent is out of the office.
- We have money now, and the last thing I want is to leave town with a cheap soggy wedding.
- Well, David, these kinds of parties take time and planning. When I planned that Casablanca-themed party for your mother's 40th, I had to quarantine the camels for a month.
- I lost my Patek Philippe in that lake, but I wouldn't have had it any other way.
- Are friends getting the same discount as a family? That doesn't sound right.
- Why don't you take it easy, Alexis, as you did with your education?
Moira from Schitt's Creek quotes
Moira is the eccentric former soap opera star, wife of Johnny Rose, and mother of their children, David and Alexis. Here are some hilarious quotes by Moira.
- Who knows what will befall us tomorrow? You could be hit by a Mack truck or bopped on the head by a tiny piece of space debris.
- This wine is awful. Get me another glass.
- Oh, I'd kill for a good coma right now.
- A heavy salad might as well be a casserole.
- There's nothing here but hot singles in my area.
- How mercurial is life? We all imagine being carried from the ashes by the goddess Artemis, and here I get a balatron from Barnum & Bailey.
- Nothing is a sure thing, so you should look at every opportunity as a pearl in an un-shucked oyster.
- The world is falling apart around us, and I'm dying inside.
- We're all pitching these days like communists or non-union actors.
- I would be pleased to RSVP as Pending.
- Be careful, John, lest you suffer vertigo from the dizzying heights of your moral ground.
- You are blind to reality, and I am most proud of that.
Schitt's Creek is a hilarious show that graced the screens for five years. Its characters have entertained viewers with their funny lines in captivating storylines. These quotes showcase exactly why people fell in love with this unexpectedly delightful show and its superb cast. The above Schitt's Creek quotes from your favourite characters will bring laughter to you and your loved ones.
READ ALSO: 80+ romantic crush quotes to help you express your secret love
Legit.ng recently published romantic crush quotes. Knowing what to say to a romantic crush is not easy. You need to be careful not to say the wrong things and mess up a potential relationship.
Well-thought-out words can make your romantic crush fall in love with you. This could be a chance to start a successful relationship with the person of your dreams. Send your love interest these quotes and make them think about you.
Source: Legit.ng